"Ultimately, I loved the idea of a lifelong partner, and solidifying that relationship," says my 28-year-old, resident married friend (RMF)."Marriage is the ultimate commitment, and even though I was with my husband for almost six years by the time we got married, I knew marriage would officially seal the deal.” There are many reasons to get married, even if you’re not planning to have kids.Explain your boundaries to all parties, and KEEP THEM. I offered a ton of advice about what books to read. I have a ton of other thoughts about dating people with kids, but I want to hear YOUR advice now.Give Advice Here's the thing about all kids: They will listen to another adult before they listen to their own parents. Then, over time, I took it to the next level and offered advice about school, friends, food, movies, girls, etc. I may find myself in a new relationship that involves children one day, so I need as much advice on this topic as I can get.It turns out there is very little literature on how to date someone who has children. After running into him over a period of months, we began dating.Overnight, I was thrown into a brave, new world -- one that involved a tween.You have to make sure you're serious and your partner is serious before you bring the kiddos into the mix.It's not fair to the kids if you aren't going to stick around.
Granted, our society in these ever-modernizing times is showing increased signs of acceptance of these women.But I quickly learned that this wasn't my kid, and the rules were different at my boyfriend's house. So if I felt a Playstation attack coming on, I left. I invited them places and if they didn't want to go, I went with someone else or by myself. If he doesn't do anything about it if it happens again, go straight to the kid. (And I can hear the parents recoiling that the childless girl is suggesting it! She not only gave vows to her new husband, she also gave vows to her new stepson.When you date someone who has a child, they can feel that their life has more "weight" than yours -- like you should do whatever they want to do based on their schedules and needs. Be gentle, but let them know that things are a-changin' in the house. If I ever find myself in that situation, I'll totally do it, too.For now, my advice is to also play the waiting game with the ex -- take your time before you meet him or her. Realize you are taking someone else's child into your life.Show that you care about the child, and you will go a long way towards a good relationship with the mother or father of your brand new kid.