And so, in the drear of my days, in the mundane and in the fear, in the happiness and in the thrill, in the good news and in the bad, I try to remember that God is yearning as I am yearning. You won't find it in the media or entertainment products.My battle has not been won, but it has gotten easier. They almost unanimously select feminists to author their articles and shows on fatherhood and depict men as infantile or demons.I've never seen a movie or show depicting the feelings of impotence, disrespect and victimization that most fathers encounter in family law proceedings.Wendy Langer would do well to speak with her father with open ears and an open heart. This is a real melancholy piece, and reminds me of my life, in a way, except that I was adopted, and State law did NOT allow me to know who my natural parents were.My father and mother divorced when I was a baby, and he never troubled himself to be part of my life. What an incredible amount of inner work you've done to reach the level of relationship you describe, despite not being given the model you so desperately wished for (as we all do). Tragic indeed when parents are not willing to undertake the responsibility of nurturing a child.I could count the number of times I had contact with my father on the fingers of one hand ... You have great reserves of faith, and you will only grow stronger and happier if you continue the path you have begun. Every child should have parents to stand by them, to give them guidance and strength.By the time I found out who they were, they had passed on, but I am grateful that I am in contact with some of my maternal siblings, and a few paternal cousins, and that they are helping me to heal with family photos and stories, and because of that, the huge hole in my chest is starting to scar over, but it may take the rest of my life for it to completely heal.
This is an example of the danger of anthrpomorphisms and why the Rambam spent much of his life battling against the understandings of God which borrowed too much from human expressions.
When he died, all mention of me was left out of the obituary, and he made a point of completely disinheriting me in his will. How inspiring to recite Song of Songs for solace and peace of mind. Parents must remeber to build and maintain and nourish the relationship on a day to day basis. Now that you are an adult, perhaps you should begin to look at your father's side of the story.
My only offense was being the child of the woman who had the good sense to send him packing. You are very self aware to have learnt this about yourself. Try this experiment- Tape your conversations with your children on just an ordinary day. Perhaps he had or has psychological problems that resulted from the way he was brought up.
I believed in God, so I wanted to learn more, understand more, and be more than I was. When I turned to God for practical purposes -- money, admittance to school, a good parking spot -- I felt at ease to ask, just as it was with my own father.
So I learned more about Judaism and the commandments (mitzvot). After 40 days ended I stopped reading The Song of Songs, but soon started up again. While many men leave or abandon their families it is my experience that the large majority of them are forced out by family law.