They are all asked the same question: "When you are in your casket, and friends and family are mourning over you, what would you like to hear them say about you? " To which he replied, "I know - I already got that side." After dying in an accident, three friends go to Heaven for orientation."Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner? The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. I HAVE LEARNED Sleep in your clothes so you'll be dressed in the morning. I HAVE LEARNED never try to hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. I HAVE LEARNED don't flush the toilet when you dad's in the shower. For those keyboard jockeys (those with jobs that require sitting at a computer all day) who don't want to spend the money for those fancy exercise machines, here is a little secret for building arm and shoulder muscles. Begin by standing (in your cubicle works well) with a five pound potato sack in each hand. "Because now Daddy will do the trick he's been promising us." "What trick? "To make myself beautiful." When she began to rub it off, the boy asked.. In South America, they have cold summers and hot winters, but somehow they still manage." There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump. ( Groan ...) A passenger in a taxi leaned over to ask the driver a question and tapped him on the shoulder. Extend your arms straight out to your sides and hold them there as long as you can. I'm glad you're here," the little boy said to his grandmother on his mother's side. " "Well, he told Mommy that if you came to visit, he would climb the walls." A little boy watched, fascinated, as his mother covered her face in cold cream. There are 26 vitamins in all, but some of the letters haven't been discovered yet. Someday we may learn how to make magnets that can point in any direction." A mother and her young son returned from the grocery store and began putting away the groceries. "The box says you can't eat them if the seal is broken," the boy explained.
When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the years they had been married. Then just before going to bed, take the red pill with another glass of water." Man: "Exactly what's my problem, doc? After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and 11. "If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up," said the sarcastic teacher. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "it's open! As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.